June has come like lightning and I couldn't even recall how I dreadfully spent the last few months. All I could remember was that June switched up without much confusion in my heart. Things have cleared up in, to say the least. May was slow and agonizing especially when I felt like I had to sort my own thoughts and answers to correspond with my own questions. But thankfully, God was walking with me throughout the entire process and learning to acknowledge His presence in every question that I had was what made it all enduring.
If you are already hitting your 20's, you could probably be asking the same questions as I have right now. What am I meant to do? Why am I not happy with my job? Is this really the vocation God has planned for me? With this pandemic going around with no assurance of its end, am I running out of time? Endless questions, so little answers, with so little time. I was dealing with those words over and over again and finally, I achieved peace with the few moments I rendered in seeking God's words and journaling (writing) them down.
As part of my journey, let me tell one reminder that the world has failed to tell you. Are you ready? Your career doesn't define you. Yes, you heard me. If you have been spending your time trying to figure if you're doing the right thing, doing what you love, doing what you don't love, doing what you were born to do, here's my take: It doesn't actually matter that much because any type of work that God has given you is already blessing. It gives you the income. It gives you the experience. It gives you lessons and skills that you never knew you needed. You're benefiting from it, in whatever picture we look at it. If the only thing that's bothering you from appreciating your job is your own lack of positive perception, then you gotta remind yourself that what you have right now is not only a service to your self and your family, but to God. On the other side, of course, if it brings you too much unhappiness and you're being tempted into doing terrible things that you aren't supposed to do, that's when you'll know you have to drop it. If whatever you're doing is seemingly dragging you away from your true self and away from Him, leave. You work to bring Him glory and if your job isn't helping you, that's your sign. But if you experiencing thoughts that only eat you away because of all the free-time we have right now, you actually have the power to stop it. Don't let your career define your status and your image. I know you're letting it take over your entire sanity just because you haven't figured out what you're meant to do. I know you're spending so much of your time comparing yourself to that girl you see on Instagram who has been achieving her 'dream' life at the age of 21. Stop. Take a breath. Your life is just on time. You are in your pace, your own lane, and your own journey. Your job is a God-given grace and if you are doing it heartily with the most genuine intentions, God will bless you even more! And that's a promise from Him. Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.
Now that you've shifted your mindset back to Him, you will begin to trust the process more. You'll begin to realize that time isn't against you, but is for you, for your growth, and for your success. If you currently have far better dreams that are starting to scare you because of self-doubt and lack of self-confidence, remember that God is the almighty Father and He promises abundance. There is no reason to be afraid or doubtful of yourself. He has prepared You for an incredible journey and once you've committed your dreams, your job, your life to His accord, everything will start to become so easy. Believe me, I've spend many nights regretting my past choices (like my degree, my current job, questioning my real passion) but when I shifted my focus towards becoming an obedient Christian, I saw that with all those decisions I labeled wrong, God showed so many other ways and alternatives that I can work through the part to becoming successful. I instead, decided and focused on how I can become an asset to my team instead of slacking my efforts because I was unhappy. I counted all the amazing people I met through this job, all the adventures we faced, and experiences we encountered together. I stopped despising my current situation and focused on becoming the best I can be today. Surely, God is already waiting for me in the finish line with a medal on hand. We just needed to appreciate how we are becoming a blessing to our families, our workmates, our superiors, our clients, and especially to ourselves. You wouldn't even notice that in a blink of eye, you've already fulfilled your vocation. Your lifetime vocation, as a believer of Christ, is to know, love, and serve God above anything else. Doesn't matter if you haven't figured everything out. Your career isn't your pedestal. Our God is.
So the month of June kind of glided into my heart peacefully. As I wrote down these wisdom in my journal, everything was suddenly quiet. If I don't excel in this particular field, I can always find another one. I released my dependency to God and now I will only believe that I can become the best in whatever path I choose to be in, so as long as I'm loving and serving my community and my Lord above. Isn't it wonderful? Obtaining peace just by believing in His power and name. No earthly desire nor words can ever come higher than the assurance Jesus gives.
Here's to the peace despite all of the madness this world is offering.
Anne x
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"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." - Matthew 6:33-34
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